Once, Twice, Amor

If you plan to visit me here in Paraguay, all I'm gonna say is at least ONE of us needs to either a.) know without a doubt where we are going or b.) have an amazing sense of direction lol. I say this because it's typical for Paraguayans not to be direct especially when it comes to locations. Nobody really knows how many blocks, names of streets, or addresses. If you're on a bus (and you're lucky) you'll be told to "get off here" by a friendly native who knows what they're talking about. If you're not so lucky, you'll be told the same thing by another native who has NO idea but just HAS to tell you something. It's true. "Excuse me sir, do you know where this street is?"...."Ok so this is the right direction just keep walking straight and it'll be on my left?"...."Great, thanks so much"...and you'll end up doing a full 360. It's  just something about Paraguayans hardly any of them will tell you the truth, "I'm sorry, I really don't know" this is a rare gem of a phrase if I've ever heard one lol. And you can't pull out a map because that's equal to wearing a target on your back and that's assuming you don't stand out already being an "American" aka White or "Brazilian" aka Black or "Chinese" aka Asian. Pretty much, know your stuff here in Paraguay if you want to have fun/survive. Slight subject change: We have the cutest little magnets here on the fridge in my host family home. I was curious and decided to point to a grasshopper magnet I didn't know the name of in Spanish and ask my host mom what it was. My host mom's response "Oh I don't know, a big ant." Really? No it's NOT an ant, not even close and thankfully I understood the word for ant and was able to argue. Another Paraguayan thing is they make wild excuses/comments like it's no big deal. "Ok why is there a crazy man driving really fast on a moto with a machete strapped to his back?".....don't panic he is just a gardener. "Sometimes this creepy older man drives by our house multiple times and stares into my bedroom window".....don't worry he's just curious. Lol these are encounters that will take me a VERY long time to get used to, if I ever accept them at all. One last thing before I go, sneezing here is also a common sport. If you sneeze once it means you're probably sick lol, if you sneeze twice it means money is coming your way and if you sneeze three times it means love is in the air- and don't be shocked if you're encouraged to sneeze 3 times, it happens to me all the time and it's strange but hey, it's Paraguay.